Forgiveness/ Lisa (sister)
I feel the need to respond to the unknown person's post and clear up a few things. I have never blamed Derek for the accident. Yes, he made bad choices, but he didn't not intentionally cause the accident that took my brother's life. My brother also made a choice to get into the car with Derek. He trusted him, they were friends.
I do not believe that my brother would want for our family to blame him for this. I believe that my brother would want for all of us to be able to come together and remember his life together to share memories, stories, pictures and smile. My brother's friends were his family therefore they are our family, ALL of them.
Derek's "sentence" is not over just because he is home. There are certain conditions he has to meet in order to stay home and there are certain things that he needs to do over the next few years. Not to mention his own issues that he is going to have to deal with for the rest of his life, just like us. This will never be "over" for any of us.
Yes, it hurts. Yes we're in pain every day, but so is Derek and his family. We can not go forward if we keep looking back. I will always be here for Derek because I know that is what my brother would have wanted and I know that anyone who knew the wonderful person that my brother was, knows that too even if they don't want to admit it.
I hope that we are making you proud B. I love you! Close
Wow/ A. Friend (used2bfriends)
My hat is off to you lisa and crystal for being able to forgive the person responsible for your loss. I was surprised to know that he was already home. I do not know what kind of justice sence he was supposed to go for a year but that is not for me to decide i guess. im sure his family is happy he is home. but that you have that much forgiveness in your hearts is admireable. we can all learn a lesson from it. I hope that HE learned his lesson,. Close
Our visit with Derek / Lisa (sister)
Crystal & I went to see Derek today. He seems to be doing well. I had a good time and saw Kenny, Jenna, Seba and Megan too. It was nice to see everyone and just hang out.
We were all sharing stories about you today. It was really nice to hear some of their memories. Steve was telling us about how you were going over their house for the night and he went to pick you up. After sitting in the drive way for a few minutes he decided to go upstairs and knock on the door. Mom yelled for you and you didn't answer so they thought that maybe you had left to go over there already so he returned to his truck. All of a sudden you coming running down the driveway and throw your bike into the back of his truck and start yelling I'm ready Mr. Ricker with your glasses falling off.
There was another time he was talking about how whenever anyone mentioned food or dinner you decided that you were staying put and eating your share. You were never one to turn down food. Then Derek said that no matter what was going on and how crazy you were being you always had a smile on your face. It was really nice to talk about all those memories and see the smiles when they think of you. You are so missed by so many people. It's just nice to see that because sometimes I get lost in my own sadness to realize that I'm not the only one who misses you. I really hope that we're able to get together and share more memories soon.
miss ya / Donna (ma)
hey babe, I know its been a while since i've written but its so hard to put my thoughts into words, beside how much i love and miss you. This past week has been a hard one, every day is a hard one but last week more than usual. I think of you every second of everyday and that will never change. Close
Happy Valentine's Day!! / Lisa (sister)
I love you!! I hope that you are having fun partying with everyone. I hope you remembered to tell Nana that I said happy birthday yesterday! If not, we're going to have some problems. I miss you so much. The last week has been really hard for me. I don't know why, but you were on my mind more than usual (which is A TON). I really miss you.
Pictures/ Lisa (sister)
Pictures are a strange thing. They bring back so many memories. Some make you laugh, some make you cry, and some you can instantly flash back and remember every detail of when it was taken. Pictures are all that I have left of you. Pictures and some of your clothes and school work. Yup, your school work simply because it's yours. Your handwritting, your work, part of you. I still check your e-mail .. like you're on vacation or something. I just can't seem to let you go and I don't think that I'll ever be able to do that. So, the purpose of this post was to share some pictures with you. Pictures that brought happy yet bittersweet memories for me. Happy because our nephews turned 3, but sad because you were not there, physically. I know that you were there with all of us .. I just wish we could see you, hug you and tell you how much we love you.
Tylar with his new tools!
Kameron's looking for more presents!
Our other siblings being their goofy selves!
Your boy Kory and his boy Kameron :)
Your niece and one of your nephews. Aren't they getting so big??
is Kameron & Tylar's 3rd Birthday. You should be here today. You should be here helping them open their presents. You should be here helping to put together those presents and helping the boys play with them. You should be here running around and causing all sorts of trouble with them.
I WANT TO SAY THAT,I KNOW WHAT YOUR FAMILY IS GOING THROUGH. MY GRANDMOTHER WAS KILLED BY A DRUNK DRIVER ON DECEMBER 16,2004. THE PAIN DOESN'T GO AWAY-IT IS ALWAYS THERE. MY HEART ACHES AND HURTS EVERY DAY,JUST AS YOURS DOES. MAY GOD ALWAYS WATCH OVER AND PROTECT YOUR FAMILY ALWAYS. IN MY PRAYERS!!
miss you! / Kritta
Hey B- I just got back to LA yesterday...I thought I'd be excited to come back "home" but I'm kind of torn instead. I never thought I'd put home in quotes when referring to LA either..but home is where the heart is and right now I feel like I left mine back in MA. It's hard seeing your family and the boys and everyone because I got used to that, then its like WHAM I'm back across the country with an entirely different life. I'll be torn for the next few weeks but I know I need to be doing something with my life too..and thats why I came here, you know? No matter where I am I know everyone will still be there for me and thats what really matters. I'm pretty lucky to say that, and have you to thank for it! Imagine if I didn't meet you..I don't know where I'd be! Love you and miss you so much..and wish more than anything you were still here. Always my babyface <3 Close
merry christmas B / Sylvain Junior (friend)Read >>
merry christmas B / Sylvain Junior (friend)
Hey b i know im late but merry christmas b i can't wait till wemeet again until then keep lookin down on all of us Close
Merry Christmas!!!! / Lisa (sister)
Merry Christmas B! This time of year is so hard for all of us. I know how much you loved Christmas and how you enjoyed playing with the kids' gifts each year. I'm sure you would have LOVED the motorcycles Kameron & Tylar got this year! I know that you were not far from them last night when they got them. I could hear you saying "Kameron, pop a wheely!" You are so missed. It's so hard to be merry and enjoy Christmas. We know that Christmas is just not the same without you and it never will be, but I try to enjoy it because I know you would want for us to. I miss you little brother. I hope that you enjoy another Christmas in Heaven. I'll be thinking about you ...
What an HONOR!!!!!! / Lisa (sister)
Introducing .....
Brianna Jeanne Demers 9 lbs, 7.6 oz 20 2/3 cm
Mike's baby girl was born on Wednesday December 6, 2006. They named her in your honor B. Isn't that something? What an honor to your memory to have his baby girl named after you. His child's name was decided the moment they found out they were pregnant. Regardless of whether it was a boy or a girl, Mike knew he wanted to honor YOU. Isn't that amazing? I know you must be so honored and proud. I know that you will be watching over all of them and I'm sure you gave her a kiss while she was on her way. She, along with Selena, Kameron and Tylar, is so blessed to have such a wonderful guardian angel. They are the luckiest little ones!!
You are so missed by so many B. You will never be forgotten by those who love you!!!!
I love you so very much little brother. Keep watching over us and smiling down on us. Close
Happy Thanksgiving!! / Lisa (sister)
Happy Thanksgiving B. Today is a paricularly difficult day for me because if you were here you would be with us today. You loved Thanksgiving and you loved to eat. I made my first cheesecake today. I wish you were here to eat it! I'll be thinking of you today as I always do and I'll be missing you a little more than usual today. I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving in Heaven. Say hello to Michael, Nana, Grampa, Aunty Kathy and all those who are there with you. Give them all a hug for me.
hey B I was just looking at some old pictures of you and I found this and I thought I would share it, After all its about you. I copied it and changed a few things to make it my own. Brian’s Smile 8-3-2001 Brian could make me desirously happy or crazy with anger quicker than anyone I’d ever known, and when he smiled everything else disappeared. And I could not help but smile back. He had a million smiles, but there was one in particular that I could even hear in his voice across the phone from miles away. It was playful and knowing and cynical, and sincere, secretive and assertive, and a thousand other paradoxical things all at once. That smile made me laugh when I was hurting, forgive him when I was angry and believe him even when I knew he was lying. That smile made me fall in love with him and that was the last thing I ever wanted to do. When he was mad or hurting, thinking or listening his face was stone. When he smiled though, I felt like I was looking right into his soul and when I made him smile, I felt beautiful inside and out. Brian was the first guy I ever really loved. Sometimes when he held me and my head was resting on his broad shoulder I felt that he could hear my deepest, darkest thoughts. He always knew how to say exactly want I needed to hear. He would touch my face and look into my eyes and say he loved me with such warmth that I couldn’t help believe. From the first time we touched, he dominated my thoughts. I would try to concentrate on school, my family or my other friends, but it was no use. I would tell myself over and over again that he wasn’t the kind of guy I needed in my life, but with each passing day, I only wanted him more. I felt so out of control, so scared and so excited. I would fall asleep at night thinking about his kisses, and wake in the morning with his soft magical words ringing in my ears. Sometimes I would tremble when he was near, but once he put his arms around me I would relax and feel safe again. If he was scared or insecure, I only saw it once or twice, like the rest of his emotions, I could never tell how much was an act for my benefit and how much he really felt He fascinated me. I would stare into his beautiful blue eyes and wonder if he had any idea how much control he had over me. If he knew he never let it show. Then, one day it all came crashing down around me. He was gone and I was hurt, I wondered if he ever really loved me. I had so many questions and so much to tell him. It was like an alarm went off to soon, and now my dream was over. My heart cried out for him, but my mind warned me to move on. I learned more from Brian than from any other guy, with on single exception of my father. Someday I’ll take those lessons, and move on without Brian. But still even after time I will still drift back to the sweet dream of my first love, and I’ll always be haunted by the images of his Smile. I love-loved his smile.
I find myself thinking of you more and more lately, I guess thats cuz when you were alive even if we didn't talk, I knew you were happy. Now I don't know where you are or what your doing. Your are always in my heart, I will never forget you.
Hi B! / Lisa (sister)
Did you have a good time w/ everyone yesterday? Did you celebrate Grampa's birthday? I hope that you all had a great time. I hope that you remembered to give Grampa & Nana my love. I miss them so very much. Although, I have to admit that missing you takes up most of my time and occupies my mind quite a bit. I have managed to somewhat control my emotions. I can keep myself from crying if I just push the thoughts out of my head. It's not easy to keep myself distracted all of the time, but I'm trying to. I do the same thing when it's time for bed because I know that if I don't I'll relive that night over again as I have so many times before and I just don't know how to deal with that so in usual Lisa fashion, I avoid it. I guess that's one of the downsides of being a Belanger huh? I haven't been going to the cemetery that often. Since your stone was put up I find it harder to go. Maybe it was just easier when there was an empty place there, but now there is a picture of you that I see every time and it takes all of my strength to not have a breakdown. Sometimes, I can allow it, but most of the time I am not alone so I must control myself. Are you keeping an eye on Derek? Is he doing ok? I hope so. I think about him all of the time and I really hope he is doing well. So, make sure you keep an eye on him B. I wish there was someway for me to know how he is doing, but I don't want to make things any more difficult for him or his family so I guess it's better this way huh? It's just so hard. I guess I still worry too much right? Well I have to get back to work and finish doing all this fun discovery. I miss you so very much. I love you even more.
To Selena, Kameron & Tylar / Lisa With A Message From Uncle B.
I see you every morning when you rise out of bed I see you every night when you rest your sleepy head
Although you can not see me I'm never far away For in your heart is where I'll always stay
I'll watch you grow each and every day I'll listen to your words each time that you pray I'll alwys be by your side and help to guide your way
As long as you keep me in your heart I promise I'll never go away So when you think of me try not to cry or wonder why
I'll always be your angel Your loving Uncle B Until the day you come home to me
I wrote this poem shortly after the accident after waking up from a visit from B. I'm sorry it took me so long to pass on the message. Even though the three of you drive me crazy, I love you all very much and I know your Uncle B does too. Close
HEY HUN, I MISS YOU SO DAM MUCH. I THOUGHT NOW THAT THE CASE WAS OVER THE HEALING PROCCESS WOULD START BUT I GUESS THATS JUST BULL CUZ I STILL FEEL THE SAME AND NOTHING HAS CHANGED I THOUGHT I WOULD FEEL SOMETHING BUT I DON'T ! I THOUGHT HEARING DEREK SAY GUILTY IT WOULD HELP BUT IT DIDN'T I FEEL LIKE I LOST YOU ALL OVER AGAIN AND I FEEEL REALLY BAD THAT DEREK WENT TO JAIL PLEASE WATCH OVER AND PROTECT HIM AND MAKE SURE HE KNOWS WE LOVE HIM AND WANT NOTHING BAD TO HAPPEN TO HIM I JUST HOPE DEREK AND HIM FAMILY CAN FORGIVE US FOR THIS LOVE AND MISS YOU SO VERY MUCH
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